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The typical scenario reads something like this
You write it down, you spend time meticulously planning your vision, you run it by your closest friends, who respond that overall it’s a good idea but needs a few tweaks.
You do some more research, you save up, you feel prepared, and finally reveal the whole shebang to your family in the hope they’ll give you a much needed boost of encouragement, only to be met by lukewarm enthusiasm, as your mom asks,
“Honey is this what you really want? I mean do what makes you happy.”
So you cautiously set a date, adamant that you can make it with or without their support, yet each time the deadline arrives you stall like a deer in the headlights, gripped with anxiety and an unbelievable amount of fear.
Sound like you?
Me too. The tragedy is this can happen for years, as life passes us by while we’re stuck in the planning stages.
Thing is time waits for no-one
Overcoming fear doesn’t happen instantly or automatically. It is the result of deliberate intention, and conscious action towards doing things that scare us, so that we can grow as individuals, and expand the possibilities in our lives.
The interesting thing about human nature is, the minute we experience pain, we never want to experience it again. For this reason, we do things to ensure that we do not get hurt. In fact, people go to great lengths to avoid pain.
Experiencing pain and learning to conquer it, is necessary for growth
Every one has a season; the ideal time in which they should strike out and make things happen, but few of us actually capitalize on it, simply because we’re fearful…
- Of failure
- What other people will think
- Who’s watching
- Ridicule and setback
- Losing our finances, friends, family
- Changing our lifestyle
To name a few reasons. That’s perfectly understandable, in the sense that you’re human, and sometimes circumstances can conspire against you, making you question your abilities.
So this post is for those who are sitting on fantastic ideas, and are serious, and I mean deadly serious about change.
5 Ways to Stamp Out Fear Once and For All
1. Take Action
I know, I know you’ve heard this before, but I’m not talking gigantic action, I’m talking one small step to start with.
Taking the first step is absolutely crucial, in your journey towards success
Psychologically speaking, the first step is by far the most challenging to overcome, on the other hand, it is also the most rewarding, as you leap into the unknown and start afresh. There is nothing quite like the euphoria attached to achieving something you previously thought was hard or even near-on impossible to do. Once you’ve mastered that initial hurdle the next few steps will feel like a breeze, I guarantee.
2. Imagine good outcomes
We have an imagination to project what we’d like the future to look like, however, a side effect of being able to envisage the best is envisaging the worst. Uncontrolled imagination is a nesting ground for fear that can completely ruin our ability to make moves.
Anxious, chronic worriers misuse their imaginations to an extent that upcoming events feel like catastrophes waiting to happen. No wonder dreams can be blighted by fear and anxiety. Let the focus on your goals outweigh the focus on your fears.
3. Surrender to your feelings
Accept your anxiety: don’t try to fight it.
Watch your anxiety: when you notice it, scale your level of fear and begin thinking of positive things only.
Act normally: carry on behaving as if nothing is different, as this sends a powerful signal to your unconscious mind that its response is over-dramatic and not needed because nothing unusual is going on.
4. Making mistakes is part of the process
Making mistakes is an essential part of the process. You will never be able to develop a new skill and reach your goals, without passing through the learning phase.
The reason most people want to avoid mistakes (deep down) is because they believe that if others see their errors, they will look less worthy. In such cases they believe the best way to hide their flaws is to appear as perfect as possible and this is where perfectionism comes from.
5. Don’t take things personally
A professional failure is not a reflection of your personal abilities.
Winners take failure in their role, never in their identity
Just because you failed professionally doesn’t mean you cannot pick yourself up personally, and start again. You can and you will be far more competent the second time round.
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