Relationships: 5 Ways to Overcome the Black Man Shortage

I’m invisible to the modern Black man because

  1. My features aren’t exotic
  2. My complexion isn’t honey toned or white
  3. I don’t have long flowing hair
  4. I don’t have a bubble butt, wide hips or blow up breasts
  5. And apparently I have a stanking attitude
  6. I have no manners, no class, and I’m desperate

Are you seeing a pattern here?

A large percentage of Black men in our generation aren’t looking for values, morals or a good mother to their children – somewhere along the line, their priorities became skewed – as they now want a sexy play thing or a woman who has the right complexion, body parts and someone who will bring them the quickest approval from society, and a sense of esteem. And we wonder why so many relationships are dysfunctional.

For years, Black men have wanted to prove they are winning by dating and marrying outside of our race in droves, sometimes as a genuine preference, but in most cases, to move up the social stratus, a trend we are going to address today, even though every other minority race still chooses their own en masse. In basic terms their goal is being able to say:

Look I’ve made it. I’m somebody. I can get a woman outside of my race.

 

Wearing: Marc by Marc floral dress and Marc Jacobs braided gold heels

I didn’t give up on Black men Black men gave up on me

The first problem when they look at me, is I’m indigenously Black, and not only that, I look Black. I have Black features and I’m dark skinned. That’s right I look like them. Therefore I don’t warrant their approval.

Are you frustrated and struggling to find Black love? Well you’ve come to the right place.

Stop blaming yourself girl! It’s not entirely your fault; we are in a deep relationship crisis in the Black community  ~ or to put it bluntly some Black men have lost their mind! If these preferences are the new standard by which to date a Black man then you can count me OUT.

Just imagine the majority of Chinese men rushing to date celebrate and marry Black women

chinese1Wouldn’t you laugh out loud at the level of self hate?

Especially if they implied their own women were lacking.  It would cause you to question their motive, and disrespect them when you realized:

‘If you don’t love your own, then you cannot love yourself.’

Which is precisely how some Black men are behaving with glee. Well let them bask in other people’s admiration, because eventually they will have no option but to conclude, that you cannot change who you are, nor how the world perceives you.

Do you think Chinese women would wallow? Of course they wouldn’t neither should we

So where does this leave Black women?

Desolate, out of place, unprotected and searching for our missing piece. I mean, for years, we have carried the weight; prison sentences, infidelity, verbal and physical abuse, thinking one day he will see that we have sacrificed, see that we understand, and have held the torch without fail. But no. What a slap in the face.

We can argue over the obstacles hindering Black men from being completely focused and successful husbands, fathers and sons, but what are they doing about it? Are we as Black women supposed to stick around and wait until these men turn 70, to figure out they should have treated us better? Or should we begin to think about catching up with the rest of society, and demand sustainable relationships and marriages from any race?

hey8

The main problem as I see it is a lack of self esteem

Who said dating and marrying Black women was a lesser choice anyway?

hey12

I will always treat Black men with respect. That is how I was raised. I have a Dad I adore and an incredible brother. Not forgetting the men who have supported BCG and those who have extended their kindness.

I’m speaking out against the increasing level of arrogance and Black woman bashing – unfortunately there isn’t enough room or time to detail it in one post – because the discrimination has become intolerable to the point that:

I have no idea what race I will marry and neither do my girlfriends

We are all fed up

That’s the main reason why Get a Great Guy in Under 30 Days! was created for you. It is written with the intention of helping you secure your very best match from any race. Or in other words every living man with a pulse.

You’ll no longer look back in anger and regret, nope this info, will encourage you to look ahead with hope and confidence, knowing that you are fully equipped to attract a partner you desire, who loves you, and only you.

Because one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.

5 quick tips to overcome the Black man shortage

  1. There are plenty of cute couples on social media who are more than happy to share their story! Follow them.
  2. Work out and exercise I’m serious ladies: Make no mistake men are visual and you don’t want to risk being left on the shelf.
  3. Build your life: Pursue your passions, everybody looks good nowadays  – especially with filters. Give yourself a cutting edge by developing your own personality to boost your marketability to every race.
  4.  Get yourself financially secure
  5. Learn to make a few recipes really well

Would you date outside your race?

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Relationships: 5 Ways to Stop Dating Potential

Photo cred: @damnrottenkid How to STOP dating potential Not going to take too much of your time know you have a busy week ahead mama nonetheless this is a post worth checking out because if you’re an ambitious black female, maybe you’re aiming for a graduate degree or you’ve just been promoted at work; now your career is sorted you’re probably looking around wondering where all the good brothas … [Read More...]

Comments

  1. I love love love love love this! Your dress is bomb. You could have improved with some figures to show us how bad it’s getting. Aint nothing but the truth. Black men have damn lost their mind. I do think there are nice black men out there. I don’t have the time to wait and twiddle my thumbs. I have been cheated on too many times it’s time to get some cream in my coffee.

    Tiffany. x

  2. Thanks Tiffany! I don’t expect everyone to agree with me as everyone has their unique viewpoint. There are great black couples and black men in this world…I’m just not convinced there are enough to go round. And everyone deserves to experience love! As you said why should we wait for an eternity when we are more than capable of attracting someone who will see our worth, whether their Black, Hispanic, Caucasian, or Indian.

  3. Vivien Rose says:

    The crazy thing is when black women date and marry outside their race, the black men and their friends get nasty!!! So deep down they feel that black women are their rightful ‘inheritance’ but when someone else of another race claims us because they haven’t, black men cop an attitude! Black men, wake up. Your women love you but they are NOT going to wait for you and pass up love.

  4. Angel Eyram says:

    That was a great article. By the way I love your dress, and your skin is glowing, what lotion do you use and when are you going to write an article on skin care?

  5. This is so sad to hear…On behalf of my brothers I apologize and pray they find their way home. I’ll tell you how ridiculous this situation is; I recently went to get my haircut and got into a conversation with my barber, you know just general chewing the fat. To cut the story short, he assumed just because I’m a professional black man that my wife must be white. I was so enraged that I told him right away that my wife is Black and not only that she’s African. Not Redbone, Greenbone, Yellowbone, or Turquoisebone you get the drift.

    On another occasion, I went shopping and the shop assistant happens to be Black, she saw how I was dressed, asked what I did for a living and automatically assumed I was with a white partner. To make it worse, she said something on the line that I look like a Black man that should be with a white woman. This broke my heart; here’s my sister looking at me thinking I would reject her because I look like I’m what society would call winning. I told her I’m not flirting with her, but she’s beautiful and my wife is Black just like her and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

    • Thanks so much for your comment Lee! I have a nephew (at least he’s like a nephew) who is already saying that he finds Black women ugly at the age of 12 and I know his Black friends feel the same way!! It’s great to hear from a Black man who thinks for himself and didn’t bow down to peer pressure or society. Thank you for having the courage to select a wife based on what you desired within. That is what I call a REAL man. And you will probably be married to her long after the so called men, who choose wives based on appearance, or based on how others will judge them.

  6. Vivien and Angel thanks so much for your comments! Vivien you are right on the mark. I don’t hate black men. I love black men. Doesn’t mean there isn’t a dating crisis, for more reasons than dating outside of our race. We have an incarceration problem, and issues with abandonment. I’m just not a woman who is going to beg a man to be with me. I date the men who want to date me. Thanks Angel! You’re a gem. What a great idea! We shall write some for sure.

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